It is hard to believe we are only on day five. I feel like it has been much longer with the magnitude of this decision. We didn’t find a church. We are literally just laying around discussing as the kids come and go with the television.
We don’t know even know if we should stay here another night or go to a new hotel. We know check out is at noon, but don’t do much either way about making a decision about staying because we are so consumed with the decision about adoption.
We finally come to “yes” about this sibling group of three, tell our kids (they cheer…even Adeline), and tell the teacher at the orphanage. Then the doubt sets in and Chris asks our facilitator to call the teacher and find out more. Did she already tell the kids, etc? It is like we are paralyzed with indecision. It is a situation I have never experienced before.
We have said many times just during this week how much harder it would be for the families that come from America. They are jet lagged and culture shocked. We aren’t jet lagged, and although we still get surprises, we aren’t as shocked after living here almost two years. It would make a life changing decision that much more stressful, in our opinion.
The hotel employee raps loudly on our door a bit after 12 and basically tells Chris to pay for another night or get out. This is precisely the motivation we needed to make a decision. We don’t like the set up, the shower leaks all over the floor, we get food crumbs on their carpet while eating around a coffee table sized table, using the bed and two chairs to sit upon. Yes, time to go. Too bad we didn’t work harder at using their wi-fi to find our next hotel.
We drove around to do the hotel finding in person. Success after number six! Thankfully each hotelier was helpful and let us walk through a variety of room combinations before we finally made a choice. Two rooms, one unit. Just like a family again. This time we are over looking the Sea of Azov in an off season vacation place. We have had all hotels basically to ourselves.
The sunshine and nice weather lifts our spirits. It was a good idea to leave the other place. Depressing surroundings can most certainly influence big decisions. We feel encouraged about going forward.
All this time, however, we have been monitoring the news regarding Russia and Ukraine. I haven’t spoken of it because I wouldn’t do it justice and it is constantly changing. But if things deteriorate we will be ordered out of Ukraine. This is tricky timing because we can’t complete an adoption if we have to leave the country. So we seek God’s guidance and plan for us, and for them.
You are now current. I am sorry if the suspense of me not posting was greater than the story you got. I don’t do it to entertain, but to document for self, others interested in the process, and for friends and family because so much is happening that it would be impossible for me to answer individually. Chris and I are literally fatigued with all that has taken place. There are many specifics regarding our decision process left out intentionally too as these are our private conversations regarding the specifics of each child. We don’t take the decision lightly or see it as simply shopping for the right fit for our family. We now know some of their story and need.
(Chris): We have been learning a lot along the way. The weight of this decision-making process teaches us to really think about our motives in all of this. It gets the mind oriented on raw, “unfiltered,” dependence on God.